This just in:  Motherhood can be demanding, both physically and emotionally and there’s a chance you might even lose yourself in it.  Update:  You’re still in there; it just might take some digging - so fire up the backhoe. 

Caryn Rivadeneira was a magazine editor for 9 years doing what fired her up and got her blood pumping - writing and editing.  She chose to stay at home with her first-born and after her first 6 months of storybook motherhood with the Gerber baby, she began to feel isolation setting in. 

She gradually began to feel like a shell of her former self.  Surely it must just be her? How could she have any concerns when she was so blessed?  She didn’t talk about her feelings to other moms and was a bit embarrassed to be having them.  In her position as a freelance editor and writer she received letters from other moms and began sensing a theme – she wasn’t alone.

A pivotal point came at a retreat when she was pregnant with her 3rd child.  A well-meaning friend nicknamed her Mama, as in, “Hey there Mama.” And “What’s happenin’ Mama?”  It grated.  It was as if Caryn’s entire identity was wrapped up in being a mother.  It might have had something to do with the hormones, we’ll leave that question for the historians, but the genesis for Mama’s Got a Fake I.D; How to Reveal the Real You Behind all That Mom was born.

It started with a blog post that garnered a huge number of comments.  Moms were coming out of the woodwork.  When the world sees you only as a mom, an internal and external crisis results.  The difference between your gifts and how people perceive you becomes evident.

Since Caryn is a writer and editor by trade, it was natural that she expand the blog post into a full-blown book.  Writing a book (or even a grocery shopping list) with 3 small children is no small feat.  Caryn writes during any spare moment and her office is filled with toys and drawing supplies.  More often than not she writes while children are play at her feet.  She works best with the pressure of a looming deadline, a perfect skill set for both writing and mothering.

The response to Mama’s Got a Fake I.D has been amazing.  Jill Savage, mother of five, and CEO of Hearts at Home says, “Caryn Rivideniera is a real mom. With refreshing honesty, she casts vision and shares a perspective that every mom needs. If you've ever felt like you've lost yourself in the midst of raising a family, this book will help you find yourself again!”  As a result Caryn’s been interviewed for print and radio, did a book tour and has a new book percolating.  She’s in the zone.

I asked her what she’d advise a mom who’s feeling a bit lost in all the mommy-ness.  At the risk of sounding pop psych, she said, do a little interview with yourself.  Space-out when you’re with the kids for a bit and think about what gets you excited and passionate.  What are you good at?  Ask yourself questions that will help you figure out the aspects of who you are. 

Caryn also mentioned another important thing is not be afraid to tell people about yourself.  Share who you are with the world.  Move away from the approved “Mom topics of discussion list” – kids, clothes, décor, gossip and be willing to share what’s on your mind and heart.  There’s always a payoff and you never know what you’ll unearth.

Visit Caryn’s blog here.